He does not have a 'Beer Gut'

- He has developed a 'LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY'.

He is not A Bad Dancer

- He is 'OVERLY CAUCASIAN'.

He does not get lost all the time

 - HE 'INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS'.

He is not Balding

 - He is in 'FOLLICLE REGRESSION'.

He does not act like a total A**

- He develops a case of 'RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION'.